What's going on?

I don't know if anyone has noticed that I haven't written much about exercise lately. There is a really good reason for that. 

I haven't been doing any. 

After Thanksgiving, I had sick kids and then December got so busy and I just stopped going to my water fitness class and I stopped even thinking about doing any other kind of exercise. I had decided that I needed to find another way to exercise, because I felt like the water fitness class, while feeling great, wasn't giving me a good enough workout. Yes, the irony is killing me - I went from a "not-good-enough" workout to no workout. But I had decided that in January, I would go to one of the "on land" group exercise classes. And then, I stopped thinking about it.

I let my super-duper rationalization skills get the best of me.

The boys were off school for a long time. Between the regular break and some furlough days added in there, they didn't go back to school until January 9th. We have a family membership at the YMCA. Child care is included in our membership (hallelujah!). I could have brought the boys with me to the Y. Boy 2 has afternoon Kindergarten. While school was in session, I would take him with me to the Y in the mornings after dropping Boy 1 off at school and he does very well in the Child Watch. When it comes to bringing both of the boys, however, I always think twice, or thrice...

Yes, I know. Feel sorry for us - major orthodontia required. 

When those two get together, they are T-R-O-U-B-L-E. They have these, um, interesting things they laugh about and sometimes they are just down-right rude. We've had a lot of talks about respect and the way we talk about and to others. A lot. Of Talks.

Anyway, I decided to wait until school started to go back to the Y. So, on this past Friday, I went to a low-impact class called Silver & Fit. Now, as you're laughing at me, please remember that I have a schedule that I have to fit exercise into. Lobster is often at work by 7am. Boy 1 has to be at school by 8:45 am. Boy 2, by 12:30, and I pick them both up at 3:00 pm. While exercising is important, being a Mom is the most important job I have. I have to make it work within my schedule. The YMCA has a schedule, too. Unfortunately, our schedules don't always sync the way I would like.

Silver & Fit wasn't at the greatest time of day, but it would work. And it was the only low impact class I could make work. I knew I couldn't put it off anymore. I keep talking the talk, but not much walking the walk. It wasn't a very long cardio workout, but it offered good strength training and I'm still feeling it, now, two days later. I'll go back again. Everyone was really nice and those ladies can sure do their leg-lifts!

I write a lot about motherhood being hard for me. Some of you may think I'm a big wimp, and although I like to think I'm not, it may be true. I don't know what motherhood is like for others, because I have only my experience. From talking to other mothers, though, while we may go for a walk in the park, I don't think anyone, believes parenthood to be one. 

I want to write about my kids. The majority of the joy AND the stress I feel comes from parenting them, and from, often, not doing the parenting part very well. The problem is, I don't know where my experience ends and their privacy begins. 

Each has a story that didn't begin with me. And their stories may not be mine to tell.

When Lobster and I decided that adoption was our course for building a family, that very fact was one that I agonized over. People, other than us, would have a very valid claim upon the child that we love and raise. Now, I know that no child belongs to his parents, it takes a village, and no man is an island. I AM grateful for each of my sons' beginnings. Anything different, and they wouldn't be who they are. 

And they are pretty amazing. 

Boy 1 LOVES chocolate. He has an incredible memory, a great sense of humor, and a forgiving spirit. He also has some pretty big hurdles that make things tough for him and for us, as a family. He's a complicated kid, but he says it like it is  - or at least the way he sees it. He's not one to hide how he's feeling. Most of the time, I can't help but smile at that boy.

Boy 2 is a hard worker, an eager helper, and he loves to make people laugh. On the flip side of that, he is a relentless tease and he has a fiery temper. He would eat Macaroni and cheese every day, if he could. He's usually good for a snuggle and gives great hugs. He's also really good at being irritating - he works hard at it. He loves proving how grown up he is. I have to remind myself that he's still a little boy. 

Both of our boys were adopted from the foster care system, although their placements with us happened very differently from each other. Stories for another time.

Well, it's time for bed. This week is going to be a better week. More positive energy. Better portion control, more activity. I'm feeling it. Hopefully, you are too.